So as I sit at work trying to make sure that everything is in line for my leaving work for 8 weeks (I mean how do you even prepare for that, there is no way they can do without me, RIGHT??? hahaha, so we wish huh?), I am very bluntly realizing that HOPEFULLY at this time next week I will be holding my fat little baby boy :). This is really something that is weird to think about honestly.. As I have said before there are just so many emotions it is hard to put everything in order in my head! I wonder many things... but I am going to try to compile them into 7 things..
1. I wonder if the stretch mark fairy will find me... Knock on wood, and it better not happen IN THE LAST WEEK, I have not had one stretch mark pop up... What if I have him and shrink like a balloon and all these "marks" pop up. I will die if I look like Freddie came and got me with his dagger claws! (By the way this is just me being hard on myself, by no means am I throwing judgement on anyone else :) that might be cussing me reading this ). I have located the nearest place to tan to the house which I will be there the day after we are home as I have been pastey Mel for 9 months longer then I cared to. I will be the darkest white girl IN THE WINTER that you have ever seen hahaha! As well as I found the shortest drive to Gold's which I am not sure if I like that I am SURROUNDED BY THEM... It really puts a damper on the excuses that I always have more then enough of in my head on not to go :).
2. I wonder how it will be again having to worry about if I have a pooch or if I need to suck in hahaha... It has been so nice for the last nine months lettin' it ALLLLLL hang out and not having one ounce of care about the gut that was molded by anything you wanted to eat being in there. I do have to say that I will miss that ALOT about pregnancy, I will not blog about missing pregnancy yet though because I can't see the list of things being long hahaha! It has been a great experience but I will pass my great experience torch to the next friend that wants it. I hope they have one as mine went, it was easy and pleasant (after the nausea) to go through.. something I will always have an appreciation for.
3. I wonder how many things I think I know about a baby that I really have no clue about. I was talking to my friend Jen last night and she reminded me as we were talking about her experiences with her boys about the realization that I had a few months back. Example of what I am talking about as far as having no clue... I consider myself pretty knowledgeable on knowing about babies, common sense type deals from being around my beautiful friends that are mommas and their beautiful kiddos. Or should I say that I thought I was knowlegdgeable until I realized, uhhhhhh HAVE I EVER GIVEN A TINY BABY A BATH? To me it is a very important part of having a child, am I wrong? hahaha.... Then that is when it hit me, we are going to have a fabulous time with me not being as smart as I think I am with babies, and Brad following me hahaha! I guess I am only really good at playing and loving on the babies which isn't bad, but man I think we are going to have a huge heart attack when we get home on our own haha!
4. I wonder if I will be a "cool parent"... I think having a boy- he will have me wrapped around his little finger, same way as a girl would her daddy. This scares me.. most of you know that I have a basset hound that has over the past 6 years gotten me as tightly wrapped around his "paw" it's ridiculous. I know that I sound dumb, but I base alot of having a kiddo around me having him... I love him more then anything, it scares me sometimes how much of a child he is to me and how much I love him as it scares me for the heartache that that can bring. The few times that he has gotten in trouble which I am sure Brad would give me the crooked eyebrow about my definition of "trouble", it will devestate me all day that I yelled at him and wonder if I hurt his feelings. I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW... its ridiculous but it is true... **RANDOM MOMENT STRAIGHT AHEAD** There was one time when he was I think one and he was enjoying his stay outside or so I thought while I was at a volleyball tournament until I found out that as I was in Austin, it was pouring in Pflugerville... I had no clue... to this day, typing this, I get tears in my eyes and feel so bad that he was in the rain. See what I am saying... it's bad, so I am so afraid that I will be a pushover when I have a kiddo... just by how much of a pushover I am with my dog :).
5. I wonder if I will really be able to physically put myself through the demand that I "think" I will be able to. If my make-believe world comes true, I will be in the gym as soon as the "south pole" allows.. or should I say I will be working out. I have a NEW AND IMPROVED VERSION OF.... DRUM ROLL.... BUNS OF STEEL.. yeah you heard me right.. you 'member don't cha.. the buns of steel, legs of steel, abs of steel, arms of steel.. Yeah I have them in VHS but can't seem to find my VCR hahaha! So yeah I have that baby on DVD in the plastic, as it was of course purchased for me to use throughout the pregnancy so that I wouldn't have cheese grater butt but as oh my gosh do I have...... but yeah that went out the window. I think I will be ok sleep deprivation wise because of the days of Dicks vs. Siemens and only getting 2 hours of sleep Wed.-Sat. every week, and I lived... barely, but with coffee I can do anything! haha! By the way, I am so stinking excited to tan and drink as much coffee as I want (ok I have to moderate with breast feeding in the beginning)! Doesn't that just sound awful though.. bring back the wrinkly skin and yellow teeth, that is what I am going to do.. BROWN IS BEAUTIFUL.. Dear Teeth and skin, BREAK TIME IS OVA (OVER)!! hahaha!
6. I wonder if I will really breastfeed as I "want to".... I just can't get over to one side or the other on the teeter totter I am on with that business. I will keep this clean as I know my pops reads this ;) but I really just don't like the idea of something drinking from me like a goat... if he starts nudging up on me like a calf that is going to make me call it quits hahaha! I know that that sounds AWFUL... and so selfish but man I would like to say that a woman goes through about the most 9 NOT SELFISH MONTHS of her life while pregnant... that takes me to think come on, you have 6 more weeks (I am only planning to do it for 6 weeks and then have the remaining 2 weeks of the 8 weeks total I am off for work drying up and dealing with the leakage haha) and it is so beneficial for him. It really does scare me to death bringing his precious chunky butt into the world during such a sick season.. especially this season.. 22 million with the swine flu, THAT IS CRAZY! With all that I am wondering about, I do not want to have to wonder if he wouldn't have caught a cold if I would have given him extra momma nutrients out of the milk jugs.... I don't even think Brad listens when I talk about this anymore because my mind changes every other day :).
More for jokes-
7. I wonder if I will still be attractive to the gentlemen that whistled at me driving by today. GOD BLESS EM, but ARE YOU SERIOUS...glad to know that from the CHEST UP that they can see, I am candy to them.. why don't I step out of the truck, and we can have a conversation??? I wish soooo bad that I had the guts to do that.. CAN YOU IMAGINE THEIR FACES! OHHHHHHH Hi sir, would you like to be my baby daddy?? OH MAN THAT WOULD BE PRICELESS. It just cracked me up, I seriously laughed... I was like yea, if only you knew what was below the window of my truck ;). These overgrown "feeders" come with a price, the price of a hospital bill after I have this baby lol!
Anyways, I have many wonders, but I am sure that this blog is in no way going to help my progression of working hard :). I hope everyone has a beautiful weekend! I have a doctor's appt. on Monday so that is where I should have all the final plans and will pass those on. SEE YOU SOON!
Thanks!
OK so my wonders have gotten a little long hahaa... but you see how random my mind is and how
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